I used to know what a touchdown catch was. Now, thanks to the NFL, I’m not so sure. But I’m pretty sure I know something about the NFL after the first weekend of the regular season.
- New England Patriots. In the words of Dennis Green, “They are who we thought they were.” They are an offense that’s going to score a ton of points. And a defense that’s going to give up a bunch of points but make some opportunistic plays. My memory isn’t so good these days but that sounds an awful lot like the team that won last year’s Super Bowl.
- Houston Texans. They are for real. The stellar passing game now has a complementary running game, along with a solid defense. The only way this team misses reaching the playoffs for the first time in franchise history is if the NFL passes a rule that says even if you beat teams on the scoreboard, the games don’t count as wins.
- Indianapolis Colts. A season isn’t a season until Bob Sanders is injured. And the Colts run defense isn’t a defense at all without him. Thanks to his injury, Arian Foster is now in the record books just behind an alleged double-murderer for most yards in a season opener. And the Colts might be headed for a wild card spot.
- Dallas Cowboys. There’s no longer any talk of the ‘Boys becoming the first team to play the Super Bowl in their home stadium. But there is plenty of talk about firing coordinators and coaches. Mark it down, this team will win the Emmy for Best Reality Show this fall.
- NY Jets. Hard Knocks turned into Hard To Watch. The team had twice as many penalty yards (125) than Mark Sanchez had passing (60). They tied a team record with just six first downs. They had a chance to win at the end but their tight end ran out of bounds on 4th down a yard short of a first down WHEN NOBODY WAS TRYING TO TACKLE HIM. Ladies and Gentlemen, your Super Bowl contenders pretenders, the 2010 NY Jets!
- San Francisco 49ers. All you need to know is when the 49ers were down 28-6 in the second half, tough guy coach Mike Singletary had his team punt the football away on three straight possessions. The ball was on the Seattle 40 the first time, the San Francisco 47 the second time and the Seattle 43 the third time. When your coach doesn’t trust the offense when you TRAIL BY THREE TOUCHDOWNS, it’s going to be a long season!
THERE IT IS!